How much for your kiss? A kiss could be the most valuable thing in your life, it’s the opening gates to your temple, to your body and most important, to your heart. But what makes the kiss so important is the person who is gonna have the privilege to receive it. That’s when things get quite complicated, because your heart doesn’t know for sure who the person should be, or should I say it does? Worse than that, it could make you believe that someone is the perfect one when it’s not… this is the inner paradox. Have you ever questioned yourself why we’re almost always attracted to the wrong person? Why can’t we focus on the right mate once and for all when it’s given the correct opportunity? More confusing than that, why is it so difficult to leave alone someone who is not longer good for you, or ever was, just because you keep attracted to him/her. How can our feelings persist in an attraction against all malefic evidences that our reason can present? A break up, a divorce, a forgetfulness can be a hard thing for us to accept, it doesn’t matter how understandable and obvious the reasons might be. Feelings is always taking us into contradictory paradoxes and we don’t understand why, or do we?
Paradoxes can teach us, as Oscar Wilde put it: “A paradox is the truth standing on its head to attract attention.” And what gets our attention here is the effect uncertainty can have. In 1955, a doctor called A. E. Fisher conducted an experiment on puppies, his team separated puppies into three groups. Members of the first group were treated kindly, every time they approached a researchers. Members of the second group were punished for approaching the researchers. And puppies in the third group were randomly treated kindly or punished. The 3rd group grew up never knowing what to expect. Their world was not a world of kindness or punishment but rather one of uncertainty. What’s really chilling is that the students found that that group, the third of puppies, ended up being the most attached to the researchers. The third group loved the researchers the strongest and was the most depended upon them. Guy Murchie called this the polarity principle:
“stress, including the mental stress of uncertainty, is an ingredient in attachment or love and perhaps even manifestations of hatred (its polar opposite) somehow enhance love.”
Uncertainty psychologically can lead to some of the greatest feelings of attachments and dependence. Good things and bad things in our lives often seem random and out of our control, so it’s no surprise that we often react with blind love and acceptance in the face of unfair existence because what else are we suppose to do? We ARE that third group of puppies. But investigating uncertainty, conquering it, to make the best decisions possible it’s advantageous. Over time life has favored activities that turns uncertainty into knowledge. Not every person out there is the best mate for you, but if it didn’t matter which one you’d pick, a kiss, a taste test wouldn’t be necessary, and it wouldn’t need to feel so good or bring us so much pleasure… Then go out there and kiss someone today : )
(Words from Michael Stevens – Vsauce) Watch the video here